Rollin on four-four’s wit no tread
Up and down da block like Barney and Fred
Kidneys bouncing cuz I couldn’t afford
The shoes to go on my ’86 Ford
I spew rhymes like a cunning linguist
Vocabulary so limited
Nothing rhymes with Linguist
Dammit
My condo is blowin up from the heat
Of a hot day, A/C is nothing but an extra treat
500k doesn’t go a long way
Here in LA
I’m a Metro pimp player
Matching khakis with my I-Pod, Love that John Mayer
Head bouncing, like I’m in the groove
Real gangstas comin up the street so I better move
To the other side before they shank me
Headin to the clinic to test for the HIV
I’m a Metro pimp player
Buyin rounds of cosmos at the local pub
Braggin on my new double dubs
Ho’s think I’m harmless
Guys think my hairs a mess
They don’t understand it’s the new style
Of the metro pimp player
I’m a dying breed among the uninitiated
Maybe its time for a new look
Emo, Punk, and grunge are so played out
The metro pimp player is what I’m all about
Thursday, June 1
Tuesday, May 30
Germaphobes
Bird Flu, AIDS, and Herpes of the mouth have nothing on this new disease of the mind. I have never seen so many intelligent people fall victim to something so utterly stupid in my life. Tulips and internet stocks had more legitimate reasoning than germaphobia. You see it everywhere, public places, restrooms, doting moms.
Of course my favorite is the public restroom. The germaphone goes into the bathroom without touching the handle on the door, does their business, washes up, uses the towel to open the door back up, but never thinks about all the bacteria in the air; the bacteria that is hundreds of times worse than bacteria on porcelain (Which has been proven to be minimal). Maybe a gas mask would be in order.
The other is the mom who is constantly cleaning their kids with anti-bacterial soap, wipes and acid baths. The kid needs to be exposed to germs or they will never develop an immune system. I say let the kid be Farmer Fred and go pick some nose goblins. Then swallow them down with the pride of a fat man at an all you can eat Crisco buffet.
Of course my favorite is the public restroom. The germaphone goes into the bathroom without touching the handle on the door, does their business, washes up, uses the towel to open the door back up, but never thinks about all the bacteria in the air; the bacteria that is hundreds of times worse than bacteria on porcelain (Which has been proven to be minimal). Maybe a gas mask would be in order.
The other is the mom who is constantly cleaning their kids with anti-bacterial soap, wipes and acid baths. The kid needs to be exposed to germs or they will never develop an immune system. I say let the kid be Farmer Fred and go pick some nose goblins. Then swallow them down with the pride of a fat man at an all you can eat Crisco buffet.
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