"These eyes are cryin’"

I think we need to revisit the bathroom rules. It seems there are still some guys out there who not only enjoy talking at the urinal but they make actual eye contact. This is not ok. Men should never, ever make eye contact when their hot link is out of the package. There really is only one reason why….something could be said. For example you’re at the urinal and a casual acquaintance sidles up to you and starts chatting it up. You, knowing the rules, do not speak nor make eye contact. You continue to ignore these welcoming moves until you double check he is gone and BAM you make eye contact and in your mind he says “So you like my junk?”. In actuality he said “Man, am I drunk” but that doesn’t matter. You have been eye violated and your pe-hymen has been broken. There is no turning back from this and you will now be going to counseling for the rest of your life. This guy is akin to a vampire in that once he breaks your pe-hymen, you will now roam the world’s bathrooms breaking other men’s. So please, let’s stop this scourge before it’s too late.